Look, I’ll be honest, the selection wasn’t super great this year.
But I’m not going let that stop this critical annual tradition of me sharing my favorite fireworks packaging. If you haven’t, get up to speed with 2007, 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011!
This year’s crop includes:
Confusing Euphemisms
Awkward Typos
…Shore?
An Eerily Accurate Look at Sandboxing (including the “Flaming Balls”)
Questionable Concepts
The formula for Barium Nitrate used as a decorative element? Why not
Old-Fashioned Copyright Infingement
To be fair, they did ‘shop out the nose ring
Low-Grade Racism
The Two Greatest Words Ever Combined Together
Advanced Irony
Elaborate Attempts to Capture Julian Assange
And Finally, the Most Brutally Honest Fireworks Packaging Image, Ever
Enjoy your 4th, everybody!
Jim
7/4/2012 3:14 PMI want to be a pyro bear when I grow up.
George Hammerton
7/4/2012 3:24 PMI really want to see the Poopy Puppy in action, I’m guessing the packaging is the most awesome part but heck, that’s good enough for me.
Cabel, we love you.
MT
7/4/2012 3:26 PMThis one qualifies under an additional header other than just “Low Grade Racism”: https://blog.panic.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/IMG_5140.jpg
It’s also blatant copyright infringement: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/State_of_Emergency_(video_game)
Chris
7/4/2012 3:38 PMI’m betting poopy puppy is just well-packaged snakes.
Design + Conquer
7/4/2012 7:33 PMCabel—would be amusing if Panic designed some faux firework packaging…we’re thinking a cross between ‘Sparkle My Mine’ and ‘Pyro Bear’ (with the inclusion of the ‘shoots flaming balls’ warning, of course). GO!
Roger
7/4/2012 8:48 PMSad there’s no GAUNTLET this year.
Matthias
7/4/2012 10:50 PM$89.99 for the Rip Rap Rush?! Will it burn forever whilst playing black music or why is it so expensive?
killperucita
7/5/2012 1:24 AMWTF??? Go to work dog flute
JZ
7/5/2012 6:15 AMThe fact that all of these say “SHOOTS FLAMING BALLS” at the bottom is just icing.
Stormchild
7/6/2012 4:52 PMStill a pretty good collection!
k8fkd78j2
7/8/2012 5:13 AMworld is sparta, sparta is the world !
Matt
7/9/2012 2:20 PMSome of these were done by the same team that designs graphics accelerator card packaging. TURBO HOLOCAUST
Bandit Aerial Productions
10/13/2012 7:24 PMBest fireworks stores online where the public can buy fireworks wholesale everyday. No 2 for 1 gimmicks or buy one get one garbage. Best prices on fireworks anywhere!